Not everyone understands how I am able to stay peaceful during stressful situations. The truth is, I don’t always. There are days when I lose my balance, and that is part of being human. However, finding peace has become a priority in my life. When I live intentionally with discipline, I find alignment within myself. My discipline takes the form of exercise, meditation, journaling, affirmations, and setting clear intentions. That alignment brings a deep sense of peace, and that peace brings acceptance. It keeps me grounded, focused, and helps me maintain a healthy state of mind.
Life is already stressful enough. I’ve learned this deeply. As a single mom and dealing with unexpected events beyond my control. For years, I felt like I was merely surviving life, powerless to change what was happening to me.
What I eventually realized is that the only thing I can truly have some control, with a bit of intention, is myself: my thoughts, my feelings, and my reactions/actions. At least most of the time, I can manage this, though having PMDD can make it very challenging.
People often believe that feelings are uncontrollable, that they just “happen.” While it’s true that emotions can rise spontaneously, I’ve discovered that our thoughts and actions have a powerful influence over them. By intentionally focusing on thoughts that uplift us and choosing actions that align with who we want to be, then we can shift our feelings. And when we shift our feelings, we shift our lives.
Even if someone doesn’t fully believe this, it can still bring peace of mind to know that while we can’t control the world, we can control how we respond.
The Psychology: Thoughts → Feelings → Actions → Results
Psychology explains this cycle in a simple way:
- Thoughts shape how we interpret life.
- Those thoughts create feelings.
- Feelings drive our actions.
- Actions produce results, which reinforce our original thoughts.
If your thought is “I’ll never succeed,” the feeling is defeat, the action is avoidance, and the result is failure, which reinforces the original belief.
But if your thought is “I can grow through this,” the feeling is hope, the action is persistence, and the result is progress, which reinforces your self-trust.
This is the foundation of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, and it shows that changing your thoughts can change your life, which can also support finding peace.
“What you focus on expands—your thoughts are the paintbrush of your reality.”
The Spiritual Side: Alignment & Energy
Spiritually, many traditions say the same thing in different words. Thoughts carry energy. Feelings amplify them. Actions put them into motion. And the results we see in our lives often mirror the vibration we’re sending out.
When your thoughts, feelings, and actions are aligned, you are in tune or in alignment. You attract experiences that match your inner state. This is why some people say: what you focus on expands, or what you give, you get.
Sometimes it’s not that events are actually happening the way we think, but because we’re so focused on them, our mind can make them feel real. It’s like wearing tinted glasses: negative thoughts make the world look darker, while positive thoughts make it brighter. Even if others see things differently, how we interpret and replay events in our minds can create real responses in our body and brain. This mental rehearsal makes the experience real for us.
Recurring events do happen too, and over time, you start noticing consistent patterns. We may ask ourselves, ‘Why does this keep happening?’ but these experiences can also make us aware of the thoughts we are focusing on the most. They highlight which thoughts we’re giving power to. The best way to heal or break the cycle is to be intentional with our thought process: allow each thought or feeling have its moment, let it pass, and try not to dwell on the annoyance of the situation. Most importantly, stop telling yourself that it “keeps happening.”
That’s why focus is so powerful: it shapes how we see, feel, and experience life. With awareness, it becomes a mirror, helping us understand what we’ve been focusing on, making it easier to heal and supporting us in finding peace.
There is a very popular spiritual saying, often attributed to Abraham-Hicks (Esther Hicks) which says,
“Life is not happening to you; it is happening from you.”
Ego vs Intuition
But here’s the catch, not all thoughts are the same. Some come from the ego mind; others come from intuition.
- The Ego Mind is loud, fearful, and controlling. It says, “What if you fail?” “You need to prove yourself.” It’s useful for survival, but it limits us when it runs the show.
- Intuition (Divine Guidance) is calm, quiet, and loving. It feels like a steady knowing. It whispers, “This feels right,” or “Trust the process.”
A simple way to tell the difference:
- If the voice feels urgent and heavy, it’s ego.
- If it feels calm and expansive, it’s intuition.
When we choose to follow intuition over ego, our thoughts align with love rather than fear. And that alignment changes everything. One way I learned to distinguish the two is by noticing my body’s response. Negative thoughts create a negative response, for example, self-criticism. When that happens, I tell myself, ‘This is not a true thought.’ So, when my thoughts feel good and positive, I know that I am in alignment with my own being. At the very least, it helps me shift my focus allowing me to feel better and connect with my peace.
Yin and Yang: Balance in Life
Life will always contain both stress and peace, struggle and flow, fear and trust. The yin and yang symbol reminds us that both sides are necessary. Darkness teaches us to appreciate light. Chaos shows us the value of peace.
I no longer expect life to be without stress. Instead, I see stress as the shadow that makes peace even more precious. My goal is not to control everything, but to bring balance within me. So, I nourish my body, mind and soul, so that I can meet life with strength, clarity, and compassion. I don’t want to lose myself to life circumstances. Therefore, I aim to do my best with what I’ve been given. I try to stay focused and motivated to react from love rather than fear.
Both the light and the shadow of life serve as a guide. The challenges push me to heal, grow and move in new directions, while the light reminds me of who I truly am and the life I really want to create. It feels like home.
“Peace isn’t the absence of chaos; it’s the presence of alignment.”
Finding Peace: Closing Intention
My journey has taught me that no matter what life brings, there is always a way back to peace, love, and alignment. Peace doesn’t come from a life without problems; it comes from choosing alignment in thought, in feeling, and in action. And if I can find it, you can too, because that light, that peace, already lives within all of us.
This is all part of why I began adding intentions and affirmations to my journals. It is why I created on my latest journals, a space to shape life with true intentions and help reprogram yourself. In its recent edition, I infused it with Reiki energy and added guided intentions at the beginning of each section. My hope is that it serves as a companion for healing and self-discovery, helping others step into alignment and live the life they truly desire.
I hope with all my heart that this message sheds light for you, and that it supports you in finding peace even amidst a life full of chaos.
Journal Prompt
Write about a stressful situation you’re facing. What perspective or intention could help you feel more grounded and at peace?
If you’re ready to live more intentionally, explore your inner world, and get into true alignment with what you desire… my Reiki-infused guided journals are here to support your journey.
→ Explore my journals here ✨
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Beautifuly written
Amariliz (beautiful name for a beautiful woman!), I love how you express yourself so clearly in every word you write. Thx for sharing your light in what seems to be such dark times! Continue to be you…do you, and please don’t ever stop sharing you❣️
Thank you, thank you from the bottom of my heart! Comments like yours remind me why I building and sharing this space. Life has its dark moments, but the light we share with each other makes all the difference. Sending you love and gratitude.
Also, please don’t forget to check your spam folder to confirm your subscription. xoxo